Career Day

This month my son's third grade class has been setting aside a few times each week for parents to come in and discuss their careers. Today is my day. I have 25 minutes to "present" - that is a lot of time to speak. I'd better be prepared.

The way my world works, everything I do needs to be connected to an ultimate, primary purpose. I want to shape the young minds. I want them to hear passion in my presentation. I want to inspire them. Among all these lofty thoughts of inspiration, passion, and purpose, I seem to keep coming back to one lowly, but very powerful motivation. I want the kids to think I am "cool". I want my son to say "that was cool Dad, thanks."

Talk about pressure! I am tempted to make up a career. Of course, kids think astronauts are pretty cool. But that is so predictable. Doctors are honored in society...a kid would think that is a pretty cool career. Professional athlete would work to. What else is cool to kids?

In a sense cool seems to be synonymous with funny. Let's see. I know my own children laugh all the time whenever our discussions have something to do with farting, butts, snot, and burping. Not that these subjects are the center of all our conversations, but ya'know what I am talking about. Laughing endlessly about the word butt seems to be what being a kid is all about.

Perhaps my career should be a butt doctor? This will for sure be a hit! I will explain that the reason the world needs butt doctors is because all butts are broken...all butts have cracks. This will work! The whole class will be laughing! I will be cool! All the kids will go home and tell their parents how cool career day was today.

Thinking through to the end of this fanatical attempt at coolness...all the parents will also call the teacher tomorrow and complain how uncool career day was.